Culture of the Lost

I've been thinking about athiests a lot lately. More specifically, I've been thinking about the nature of atheism, and what causes it. I think I've got an idea or two. I'm writing on-the-fly, so we'll see where this goes.

First of all, let's take a look at our culture. I've wondered more than once why missionaries can go to poverty-stricken countries and see tremendous conversions to Christ. How people in countries where Christianity is illegal (and punishable by imprisonment or death) will meet in standing-room-only rooms, under cover of darkness, just for an opportunity to hear the Scripture. It truly boggles the mind when, in the US, church members will stay home from church when it's raining. And raining plain ol' water, not bullets.

Not to go all Tyler Durden here, but I think consumerism may be part of the cause. In Western countries, we're advertised to CONSTANTLY. We're made to think that our lives are lacking if we don't have the latest gadget, the fastest car, the whitest teeth. What this causes is a society of consumers. And what do consumers do but, well, consume? Everything in our lives is focused on drawing in - on pulling things towards ourselves. We become black holes at the center of our own little universes and, when we are at the center of the universe, it becomes difficult to perceive anything else as being more meaningful than our own existences.

I think that this is where atheism springs from. If we are our own gods, what use have we for any others? Indeed, it becomes galling to even consider our focus wavering from ourselves. When our lives are full of our stuff and our own concerns, where is there room for God? So many of the atheists I know have such scorn for Christians. I know that I hated Christians before I became one. I think this contempt is a product of the perceived weakness of a group of people who would willingly submit to another entity, especially one that you can't see.

"We don't need God. You want me to believe in God? I'm going to need you to put him in this box for me. I'm going to need him to show himself to me, personally."

There is no room for faith in this thinking. Instead, it's a demand for a more self-focused approach. More consuming for the consumers. We want God to come to us. We want God to be a product that we can digest. What we don't want is something to be subservient to. We're far too proud and intelligent and self-gratifying for that.

And most of us Western Christians display these characteristics, too. This explains why the flashiest churches have the highest attendance - they have the best, shiniest product. It's also why, in any given Western church, maybe 20% of the population does all of the work. The rest of us don't want to stop focusing on ourselves - to stop consuming - long enough to truly build a relationship, either with God, or with our supposed brothers and sisters in Christ.

I think it's interesting that - as far as I know - every major society in the span of human existence has believed in and worshipped one or more deities. That being the case, is it completely unreasonable that - maybe, just maybe - there's something to that? That maybe you are NOT the center of the universe?

I'm not bringing all of this up to pick a fight. Truly. Atheists, I used to be where you are. I used to be you. Then, I was broken. I reached a point in my life where my own deity (myself) failed me. I turned to God in desperation and, while my life certainly hasn't been all puppy dogs and ice cream since then, I've been more filled up than I ever was as an atheist. My sincere prayer for you is that you are broken to the point where your own deity is insufficient. Not because I want bad things to happen to you, but because I want to share what I now have with you.

Hope to see you on the other side.

A Dream of the End

I had an incredibly vivid dream this morning.  Ordinarily, I wouldn't share, but this one was very powerful and is really sticking with me.  Please understand, as I describe this, that it was a dream, and didn't necessarily make entire sense with the world as we know it.  I'm just telling it like it happened.

It was The End.  Like, the end of everything.  God was preparing to enact the final reckoning, and all of the believers of the world were gathered together in one place.  It was many different faiths, too.  I don't know exactly which ones were represented, but it wasn't just Baptists, for example.  The place was a very large, very flat place, all well-manicured grass and trees.  It called to mind the Temple Mount in Jerusalem but, as I said, all grass, like a golf course.  All of the people were there, and yet, it wasn't crowded at all.  That's not a snarky way to say that there weren't that many believers.  It just defied logic, to have so many there and not be crowded.  The people clustered together in small groups, talking and sharing stories and ideas about their lives and what was to come.

A small handful of people were then chosen to take on specific tasks.  I was chosen to give prayer/last rites for the children in attendance.  When I explained that I wasn't Catholic, and didn't believe in last rites, I was told that it was OK.  It was to comfort the children and their parents, and my prayer was more than sufficient for what was needed.  I agreed, honored to be chosen.  Simultaneously, my wife was made the spirit of Death. 

Now, before you start evaluating my thoughts about the Missus, you should understand a few things.  First, the Bible states that we should strive for the greater gifts when it comes to gifts of the Spirit.  My wife has been a Christian for longer than I have and is more mature in her faith than I am.  Secondly, she wasn't kitted out with a black robe and scythe.  It was just her, and she had a very important job to do.  My job was important - I mean, I was singled out - but she was really elevated.  It was pretty awe-inspiring.

So, at a given time, we understood that some of the gathered were ready to pass on to...whatever came after.  My wife and I moved through the assembled.  As I prayed, she would reach out her hand and, whoever she touched, died.  It wasn't a normal death.  They would freeze up and the color would drain out of them and they just weren't there anymore.  Some of them were nervous as she approached, but no one was really afraid.  As we passed, some of the remaining people would thank me for the prayers/last rites.  When enough people were...I don't know..."taken", we would go back to just being ourselves and waiting for the next time we were needed.  This happened a few times.

In the last part of the dream, we were all just waiting again.  Suddenly, I heard a quiet commotion behind me.  People were talking excitedly, gasping, etc.  I knew that God was among us.  Without turning to look, I dropped to my knees and pressed my face to the grass.  I whispered that I was done waiting and was ready to go.  I felt a weight on my back, as if someone were standing over me.  He asked me if I was sure that I was ready to examine my life, to be judged.  I said, "I've been made holy.  I'm ready".

Instantly, there was a table on the grass in front of me.  He started gathering the actions, thoughts, relationships, everything from my life and setting them on the table in front of me, like tokens.  They were a sort of smoky-white color, and were diferent sizes - some small, like a penny, up to roughly two inches across.  He said, "Let's start with the people in your life - those who are important to you".  The tokens lined up North-to-South, in the center of the table.  As I thought of the people that I cared about, the line of tokens grew.  I knew that we were going to go through absolutely everything that I had ever seen, done, thought, felt.  I was nervous, but never afraid.  I felt Love.  Even knowing that my existence would be laid bare, I was never ashamed.  I knew that this was just something that must be done before I moved on.

Unfortunately, before I could see what happened next, wind blew through the house, causing the bathroom door to creak and wake me up.  I tried to ignore the creaking but, by the third or fourth creak, I was awake.  Quite disappointing.  I really wanted to see what would happen next.

I'm not really sure why I'm sharing this.  I'm not one of those "visions" people.  I realized, as soon as I woke, that it was a dream.  I don't feel like I saw the future or anything.  It was just a very powerful experience for me.  If anything, I think it provides a clear idea of how I view God.  That alone makes it worthwhile for me.

P.S.  I just put my iPod on Shuffle, and the first song it chose was "These Dreams", by Heart.